I've been a bit busy and my camera broke and life has had many ups with a couple of downs and to be honest, I needed a bit of break from blogging and thinking too deeply and have just been Being with my family and friends.
So after a month away from Hummingbird Haven, I thought I'd drop in to say hello and share what condition my condition is in. It's all good even when it seems like things are a bit crazier than normal.
August began with our FUNNR trip and then Broc and I celebrated our 10th anniversary. Probably as much fun in both of those events that people should have in one month but that was just the beginning...... Our beautiful friend, Quinn, from Rhode Island visited us for a couple of weeks. Brenna left to go back to college. We celebrated my mom's 85th birthday. After sharing our old green van for almost 4 years, we finally bought another car, We went to the Northeast Unschooling Conference in Boston. We made some new friends who are living in the coolest bus ever in our back yard for awhile. Brenna came home from college to pursue some new adventures. And today we are celebrating Cailin's 15th and Brenna's 20th birthdays!
It has been a whirlwind!! Just lots of fun with time for family and old and new friends and a bit of traveling for us all. I have pictures to share and stories to tell and as soon as I get rested up a bit, I'll be back!
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Happy 10
Walking out of our front door to discover a limo! Some of our amazing friends surprised us with the limo that took us to a riverfront restaurant on Jacksonville, The Chart House. The entire evening was magical. Next time we're taking them all with us!Quite simply, a decade of love, laughter, friendship, family and fun. Lots and lots of fun.
I couldn't ask for more.
Happy Anniversary to Us!!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Just a clean kitchen....(or is it?)
We had one of our usually busy days yesterday. I'd gone to an early morning yoga class, put finishing touches on our bathroom remodel, evaluated and gave suggestions to a 10 year old girl who wanted some help with her speech, had a call from a dear friend from Texas that I miss so much and talked 1 1/2 hours, visited with another friend and her son who came by so that Brenna could help her daughter learn to throw on the pottery wheel, watched Logan play a bit of Rock Band, danced at Zumba, dropped Logan off at his cousin's house, picked up a few groceries for dinner, watched my favorite show, "So You Think You Can Dance", picked Logan up during a commercial break, talked to Broc who is in Maryland at sales meetings all week and watched Brenna putting some finishing touches on some pottery pieces.
It was 10:00 and we were hungry! Brenna requested waffles so while listening to Rock Band and talking with Brenna, I made up some batter. The table and kitchen counter top were covered with clay and pots and I was so busy talking that I tried to put the waffle batter into the George Foreman Grill (which in our house should be called the Grilled Cheese Sandwich Grill because that's the only thing we ever use it for). I finally got the appliance right and the first batch of waffles oozed out on the counter which was fun to watch but made a huge mess! There were dishes from the whole day and then strawberries and bananas and maple syrup and whipped cream and nuts and then after we ate, all those dishes and the mess the dog had made while she was eating all over the floor!
The kitchen looked like right after all the guests have gone home from a large party but it was 11:00 and I still needed to get on Facebook :-), so I hugged the kids and headed to bed thinking that I would clean it up in the morning.
This is what I saw first thing when I stumbled (well I didn't really stumble but it makes for a good story) into the kitchen this morning to make some coffee and read the newspaper. There's the newspaper and the coffee right there on the table and now my laptop is here and I'm happily writing this quite lengthy post instead of cleaning the kitchen.
The only two people home besides me are my teenagers, Brenna and Logan, and one or both of them took the time to clean the kitchen late last night. These are kids who haven't had chores for 7 years! They live in harmony with their parents and 3 animals and they choose without any
rules or demands to help keep our home enjoyable to live in. No one raises their voices here unless it's to be heard over the sound of a game in the next room. There are never slamming doors or sneaking around or angry outbursts. We all like each other and enjoy our time together.
Which brings me to why I was thinking about this very thing yesterday. A Facebook Friend (someone who I know only from a homeschool co-op we used to go to) had a status update yesterday that I commented on because it made me a little crazy and I'm bringing it here without the names....
**************
(Parent 1) Gail, I totally hear you and wish I knew how to put that into real practice! I just get so irritated when I ask them to do something and they say they don't want to and it's usually something they messed up anyway.
Name of Parent 4 here, you are outrageous girl! I do take the stuff away if they don't do what I ask them to. I just want to get to the day when I ...don't have to make those threats to get them to move. That they will just do what needs to be done.
But I have to remember we are talking about teenagers and even myself as an adult has a hard time doing what needs to be done when it needs to be done
It was 10:00 and we were hungry! Brenna requested waffles so while listening to Rock Band and talking with Brenna, I made up some batter. The table and kitchen counter top were covered with clay and pots and I was so busy talking that I tried to put the waffle batter into the George Foreman Grill (which in our house should be called the Grilled Cheese Sandwich Grill because that's the only thing we ever use it for). I finally got the appliance right and the first batch of waffles oozed out on the counter which was fun to watch but made a huge mess! There were dishes from the whole day and then strawberries and bananas and maple syrup and whipped cream and nuts and then after we ate, all those dishes and the mess the dog had made while she was eating all over the floor!
The kitchen looked like right after all the guests have gone home from a large party but it was 11:00 and I still needed to get on Facebook :-), so I hugged the kids and headed to bed thinking that I would clean it up in the morning.
This is what I saw first thing when I stumbled (well I didn't really stumble but it makes for a good story) into the kitchen this morning to make some coffee and read the newspaper. There's the newspaper and the coffee right there on the table and now my laptop is here and I'm happily writing this quite lengthy post instead of cleaning the kitchen.
The only two people home besides me are my teenagers, Brenna and Logan, and one or both of them took the time to clean the kitchen late last night. These are kids who haven't had chores for 7 years! They live in harmony with their parents and 3 animals and they choose without any
rules or demands to help keep our home enjoyable to live in. No one raises their voices here unless it's to be heard over the sound of a game in the next room. There are never slamming doors or sneaking around or angry outbursts. We all like each other and enjoy our time together.
Which brings me to why I was thinking about this very thing yesterday. A Facebook Friend (someone who I know only from a homeschool co-op we used to go to) had a status update yesterday that I commented on because it made me a little crazy and I'm bringing it here without the names....
**************
(Parent 1) Is there an easier way to get teenagers to clean
(Parent 2) haha take everything away so there's nothing left but a mattress! lol i dunno I don't have a teen (yet), i heard someone say they had to do that
(Parent 1) Believe it or not I have actually done that! It was a few years ago. I am not just talking about their rooms though. I mean the HOUSE. They leave crap wherever it lands. I have asked them to clean this morning and they are meandering around. Oh yeah.. and for door slamming I have taken the door off the hinges! I am a mean mom. But it's all in love, right?
(Parent 3)is there such a thing as "cleaning teenagers?"
(Parent 4) haha funny....i remember one of my friends losing her bedroom door for a year for sneaking a boy through her window!
(Parent 1) That's what the alarm system is for! haha!
So the trashing of teens was bothering me enough that I posted this knowing that it really wouldn't make any impact....
So the trashing of teens was bothering me enough that I posted this knowing that it really wouldn't make any impact....
If you are really asking.....What's worked for us.....joyfully cleaning ourselves and treating our kids with the same trust and respect we would any adult friend...It's a win/win. Teens who are respectful and help out because they are trusted and valued....it's not a popular viewpoint around here but I wouldn't trade the relationship I have with my kids because of it for anything in the world....
(Parent 4) Well, my 2 year old cleans up and the 8 month old twins are in training!!!LOL!! What the heck!?!?!? The other 5 definitely know what time it is! They can do NOTHING they want to do until it's clean. They already know this, so there really isn't much discussion about it anymore.
If they don't comply, the chauffering stops and the gadgets get locked up until it's done!
"There's not enough time?" .....get up earlier!
"We're too tired!" .....stop staying up late!
What is really going on?!?!? There's a whole lot of things to remove from a teenagers life, so you've got TONS of leverage!!! There's going to be a million things in life you don't feel like doing, you better get over it now! Not to mention the spiritual aspects of obedience and discipline....
(Parent 5) I am quick to remind mine....."Hey, I cleaned up for a long time before any of you could do much to help"
Sorry...I kinda went off...LOL!!!! You hit a nerve, I've seen too many lazy, selfish, and disrespectful teenagers
If they don't comply, the chauffering stops and the gadgets get locked up until it's done!
"There's not enough time?" .....get up earlier!
"We're too tired!" .....stop staying up late!
What is really going on?!?!? There's a whole lot of things to remove from a teenagers life, so you've got TONS of leverage!!! There's going to be a million things in life you don't feel like doing, you better get over it now! Not to mention the spiritual aspects of obedience and discipline....
(Parent 5) I am quick to remind mine....."Hey, I cleaned up for a long time before any of you could do much to help"
Sorry...I kinda went off...LOL!!!! You hit a nerve, I've seen too many lazy, selfish, and disrespectful teenagers
(Parent 6) Parent 4, I think i should send my kids over to you for a week! heheh
And then Parent 1 (the only parent that I know, posted this)
Name of Parent 4 here, you are outrageous girl! I do take the stuff away if they don't do what I ask them to. I just want to get to the day when I ...don't have to make those threats to get them to move. That they will just do what needs to be done.
But I have to remember we are talking about teenagers and even myself as an adult has a hard time doing what needs to be done when it needs to be done
*******************
A BIT OF RANTING HERE IN CASE YOU WANT TO SKIP IT!
So there it is. I know I'm in the South. I know that these attitudes about teens are pervasive but excuse me, these people have these amazing children in their lives and they treat them with disrespect and expect them to be their maids? I think Parent 1 has teens that have been homeschooled but are all going back to school. I'd probably go back to school if any of these people were my parents and move out the first possible moment! I have a teenage stepdaughter that lives in a house like this AND I know she can't wait to move out.....Hope I don't step on any toes here but seriously people...Get a CLUE!!
RANT OVER.....
So back to my story.... I haven't always been a parent who trusts her children. When the kids were young, I had chore lists and arbitrary rules and bedtimes and food restrictions and I could see the damage it was doing to my kids and our relationship. It was easy to be a traditional rule- based parent and I was good at and could have justified it all day long. But, why would you continue doing something that is damaging your relationship with your children just because you're surrounded by people who are doing it?
I had a choice. I could continue on that path or find another way to parent. I chose trust and found a way through radical unschooling to become a parent who values the relationship I have with my kids much more than obedience. I value them as the amazing individuals that I live with too much to force them through rules or punishment to do things like clean the kitchen, mow the lawn, feed the dog, make your bed, eat your vegetables, go to bed because I think it's time, be in by 12:00 sharp because at 12:01 you are grounded!!
Trust was the key. It lead to caring deeply for each other and love and mutual respect and lots of fun and laughter. I've gone on and on and I know for the most part I'm preaching to the choir here but sometimes something happens and it just hits you and makes you thankful for your life and your kids and and the laughter and the fun and the friends around the world who have chosen this lifestyle too...
I wouldn't have minded getting up this morning and happily cleaning the kitchen thinking about the fun evening we had last night but.....
...... take a look at that picture again.......
Just sayin......:-)
A BIT OF RANTING HERE IN CASE YOU WANT TO SKIP IT!
So there it is. I know I'm in the South. I know that these attitudes about teens are pervasive but excuse me, these people have these amazing children in their lives and they treat them with disrespect and expect them to be their maids? I think Parent 1 has teens that have been homeschooled but are all going back to school. I'd probably go back to school if any of these people were my parents and move out the first possible moment! I have a teenage stepdaughter that lives in a house like this AND I know she can't wait to move out.....Hope I don't step on any toes here but seriously people...Get a CLUE!!
RANT OVER.....
So back to my story.... I haven't always been a parent who trusts her children. When the kids were young, I had chore lists and arbitrary rules and bedtimes and food restrictions and I could see the damage it was doing to my kids and our relationship. It was easy to be a traditional rule- based parent and I was good at and could have justified it all day long. But, why would you continue doing something that is damaging your relationship with your children just because you're surrounded by people who are doing it?
I had a choice. I could continue on that path or find another way to parent. I chose trust and found a way through radical unschooling to become a parent who values the relationship I have with my kids much more than obedience. I value them as the amazing individuals that I live with too much to force them through rules or punishment to do things like clean the kitchen, mow the lawn, feed the dog, make your bed, eat your vegetables, go to bed because I think it's time, be in by 12:00 sharp because at 12:01 you are grounded!!
Trust was the key. It lead to caring deeply for each other and love and mutual respect and lots of fun and laughter. I've gone on and on and I know for the most part I'm preaching to the choir here but sometimes something happens and it just hits you and makes you thankful for your life and your kids and and the laughter and the fun and the friends around the world who have chosen this lifestyle too...
I wouldn't have minded getting up this morning and happily cleaning the kitchen thinking about the fun evening we had last night but.....
...... take a look at that picture again.......
Just sayin......:-)
Friday, July 17, 2009
Bowl Envy....
I seem to be posting about Brenna lately but it's because she has these cool things going on with an end result that can be photographed. Broc and I are in the middle of a bathroom remodel and Logan is busy with guitar and a new computer game which doesn't photograph well.We're regrouping after our New Mexico trip and resting up for what will be a very busy few months. We excited about visitors and traveling to some unschooling events every month through November.
So.....Brenna threw this bowl on her wheel a few days ago and it's in the process of drying before she fires it. I think it's amazing! I spent most of 2008 going to pottery classes and throwing pots and the biggest thing I ever made that was centered was about the size of a salad bowl! I'm not sure how many pounds of clay she's used this summer but she has a gorgeous selection of pottery to show for it. The coolest thing is her enjoyment of the whole process, especially the wheel throwing.
I am just in awe of this gigantic bowl because I realize the strength and technique that goes into its creation. I just keep walking by her little studio area as it slowly dries to admire it.
I posted a picture of it on my Facebook page but wanted to share it with family and friends who may not see it there. I imagine it will be on her Etsy site in a couple of days. Her site is called Toothpaste Sandwich and you can see (or even buy :-) some of her work. She also is doing commissioned pieces and you can contact her through the Etsy site if there's something you'd like her to create just for you.
I'm hoping that my next post will be the FINISHED BATHROOM photos....heading off to work on that now...It was one of the weekend jobs that's heading into its 3rd weekend!
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Brenna's Very Cool Pottery on ETSY!
Brenna has an ETSY site where she is showcasing and selling some of her wheel-thrown pottery pieces. They are so amazing (says her mom but if I saw these pieces anywhere I would fall in love with them).
And she did such an amazing job photographing the pieces with her new camera!
Please check out her site and buy some of her cool pottery!
She is also doing commissioned pieces. Just contact her at her ETSY site or at
BrennaDee@aol.com.
And she did such an amazing job photographing the pieces with her new camera!
Please check out her site and buy some of her cool pottery!
She is also doing commissioned pieces. Just contact her at her ETSY site or at
BrennaDee@aol.com.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Random New Mexico Moments.....
Terry and Sharon Higgins 50th Anniversary Celebration
I'm just now posting some pictures of our trip to New Mexico and we've been home since June 29th! It was one of those" see everyone you can" and" pack in as much as you can" trips in a very short time. I didn't get to see as many friends and family that I had hoped to but we did see and do a lot in the time we were there!One of the best parts of the trip was spending time with the Dodd family and I got home without any pictures! We visited with them a couple of afternoons where some of the family did interviews with Lee Stranahan for an unschooling movie and Logan and Brenna stayed a couple of nights there. It's always so fun to play with them...I just wish I had taken a couple of photos!
Here's a few random shots in no particular chronological order!
Broc took this of me and all five of our kids! Logan (16) Lindsay (16) Tyler (18) Me (old!)Drew (20) and Brenna (19) We rented a van while we were there and were all over the state. If you can just imagine all these people and their stuff in a 7 person van! This picture was taken right after we had hiked up to some of the hot springs in the Jemez Mountains and right before we got lost and drove an extra FOUR hours to get to our destination.
Brenna, Lindsay and I testing out the warm springs...
A cute picture of my great-nephew, Ethan, and Lindsay..
My niece, Kristle, and her husband, Aaron, with Logan. We tailgated before the Isotopes baseball game. This picture was taken before the rain!
My brother, Skip, on top of Sandia Crest outside of Albuquerque. We all rode the chairlift up the back side of the mountain on Father's Day and went for a hike. He brought along his guitar and sang us a song or two up on top....
Brenna and Logan at the 50th anniversary celebration for Broc's parents. They clean up "real nice" :-)
This is Brenna with her stepbrothers, Tyler and Drew...She is standing up straight here with just a bent knee!
And here she is standing on a very tall rock!
Visiting Grandmama and Grandad in Bloomfield...Brenna's catching a ride with Broc through the stickers to see the garden...
Grandad (one of the best Dad's and grandads I have ever known) with Broc (also one of the best dads in the entire universe!
Brenna and Logan with their grandparents (these are Mark's parents who live in Northwestern New Mexico)
Our next trip to New Mexico will probably be in January to Sandra Dodd's Santa Fe Symposium where I'll be able to see some of the friends and family I missed this trip. And while there won't be flowers like this, I'm hoping for a bit of snow to play in and take pictures of.....
Monday, July 6, 2009
Blog Interview
Here's the interview I did for the blog, Homeschooling-Freedom and Fun for Your Family....
It's a series of questions that have been asked and answered by many people and I enjoyed not only answering the questions but reading others responses......
And in spite of the title, we occasionally do some things that aren't fun but usually the point of it is to get to something fun!
This unschooling life is a good fit for us........and I'm especially thankful for the friends we have made along the way. So thanks to You for being part of our lives...................
It's a series of questions that have been asked and answered by many people and I enjoyed not only answering the questions but reading others responses......
And in spite of the title, we occasionally do some things that aren't fun but usually the point of it is to get to something fun!
This unschooling life is a good fit for us........and I'm especially thankful for the friends we have made along the way. So thanks to You for being part of our lives...................
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